I love the idea of paying attention to who is clearly lingering hoping for more. Speaking from experience, there are absolutely times that those who come alone want to leave alone and it shows. Honoring that is also hospitable. Noticing when that attitude is absent opens the door for the kind of connection we are created for
Just stopped for a drink at Union Station DC before catching a train. Guy next to me at the bar made slight eye contact (sometimes noticeably absent at a bar). Interesting conversation about God and faith over a cigarette about 15 minutes later. He was pretty bummed about his layover. Point is (I didn’t have a point) - people outside the Church can be opening themselves to human connection in subtle ways too
This piece names something many of us feel but rarely know how to practice. Hospitality here is not about fixing loneliness or managing belonging. It is about presence without ownership and attention without control.
What you describe feels faithful to the way Christ moves among people. He notices. He stays. He allows space. He does not rush outcomes or demand transformation. Often He connects, blesses, and then steps aside.
The small moments matter precisely because they are small. A brief awkward pause. A willingness to linger. These acts cost us little, yet they can change how the week feels for someone else.
In a world shaped by schedules and careful exits, this kind of attention is already a form of grace. Thank you for reminding us that making room, even briefly, can be enough.
This is a virtuous principle to operate with. Though people often take the top down approach alone and make the church into a social cultural apparatus. In that light most of what's said could be applied to secular social work and secular morality. The mystic tends to mean the depth aspect, body as the essential body. What we must aspire to is to be guided essentially, and then to make essential contact with someones essence.
We should have Christ acting in us bottom up, rather than attempting to socially top down engineer charity alone (we should have some of this yet collaboratively guided by divine will. Alone it ultimately becomes a Church of Social Work). If we do it bottom up through an asceticism in plain sight first, it becomes Christ who knits us back into community in the best possible way: guided to who we belong with, and who we are good for, and who we should help according to providential mission; we collaboratively bring our being into proper order: the Lord harmonises our soul, and then He harmonises us with the world.
And like a kind of broken record riffing the same tune on different themes I will say: through mystic practice one can become attentive and watchful enough to hear His whispering in the depths, and become concentrated enough to feel his eternal breath of quicksilvered peace and serenity—a native wind wafting through one's being answering Amen to our questions.
In this growing watchful state we can notice phenomena, notice people, and then carefully ask for direct guidance. We can be guided to who the Lord needs to guide us to, what is right and good for us to do, and what will help Him in His mission.
Great post! I particularly like the section in which you talk about the anxiety that holds us back from acting on connection. I noticed this the other day with myself; I have been performing my music at open mics and always feel a bit of apprehension before a performance. With art specifically there is always a present fear of exposing the depths of your soul and being rejected. What gives me the strength to power through this is the assurance of my faith, as well as the potential for my music to act as a vessel for the audience to move closer to God. I spoke to a secular friend who writes his own music who does not have the confidence to share his work. His reasoning is that he doesn't understand why anyone would want to hear what he has to say. Perhaps a symptom of modernity, in which action is associated with egotism, and spirituality with disconnection from the world. I've found that in my relationship with Christ, I have become increasingly oriented toward proper action that promotes genuine connection, not world denial. This is definitely an idea that I can apply more within church life, not just in my engagement in the world outside it. Thank you for the insight!
I came to say this, too. I’m mostly on the fringes, but I still want community. I’m just wounded from trusting people too quickly, so now I’m cautious and looking for safety. But I still want to be part of the Body, however difficult it may have been in times past.
I love the idea of paying attention to who is clearly lingering hoping for more. Speaking from experience, there are absolutely times that those who come alone want to leave alone and it shows. Honoring that is also hospitable. Noticing when that attitude is absent opens the door for the kind of connection we are created for
Wow. This is so so profound. This has been on my mind lately, especially within the Church. Thank you for sharing!
Well written, and so true!
This is so beautiful. Thank you for sharing!
Thank you!! Thank you for reading!
Just stopped for a drink at Union Station DC before catching a train. Guy next to me at the bar made slight eye contact (sometimes noticeably absent at a bar). Interesting conversation about God and faith over a cigarette about 15 minutes later. He was pretty bummed about his layover. Point is (I didn’t have a point) - people outside the Church can be opening themselves to human connection in subtle ways too
Very true!
This was so so beautiful to read —- you are really talented!
Thank you so much!
This piece names something many of us feel but rarely know how to practice. Hospitality here is not about fixing loneliness or managing belonging. It is about presence without ownership and attention without control.
What you describe feels faithful to the way Christ moves among people. He notices. He stays. He allows space. He does not rush outcomes or demand transformation. Often He connects, blesses, and then steps aside.
The small moments matter precisely because they are small. A brief awkward pause. A willingness to linger. These acts cost us little, yet they can change how the week feels for someone else.
In a world shaped by schedules and careful exits, this kind of attention is already a form of grace. Thank you for reminding us that making room, even briefly, can be enough.
Blessings to you BT.
This is a virtuous principle to operate with. Though people often take the top down approach alone and make the church into a social cultural apparatus. In that light most of what's said could be applied to secular social work and secular morality. The mystic tends to mean the depth aspect, body as the essential body. What we must aspire to is to be guided essentially, and then to make essential contact with someones essence.
We should have Christ acting in us bottom up, rather than attempting to socially top down engineer charity alone (we should have some of this yet collaboratively guided by divine will. Alone it ultimately becomes a Church of Social Work). If we do it bottom up through an asceticism in plain sight first, it becomes Christ who knits us back into community in the best possible way: guided to who we belong with, and who we are good for, and who we should help according to providential mission; we collaboratively bring our being into proper order: the Lord harmonises our soul, and then He harmonises us with the world.
And like a kind of broken record riffing the same tune on different themes I will say: through mystic practice one can become attentive and watchful enough to hear His whispering in the depths, and become concentrated enough to feel his eternal breath of quicksilvered peace and serenity—a native wind wafting through one's being answering Amen to our questions.
In this growing watchful state we can notice phenomena, notice people, and then carefully ask for direct guidance. We can be guided to who the Lord needs to guide us to, what is right and good for us to do, and what will help Him in His mission.
"I know what it feels like when it works." Yup! I think we sometimes forget the power of that internal knowing.
Great post! I particularly like the section in which you talk about the anxiety that holds us back from acting on connection. I noticed this the other day with myself; I have been performing my music at open mics and always feel a bit of apprehension before a performance. With art specifically there is always a present fear of exposing the depths of your soul and being rejected. What gives me the strength to power through this is the assurance of my faith, as well as the potential for my music to act as a vessel for the audience to move closer to God. I spoke to a secular friend who writes his own music who does not have the confidence to share his work. His reasoning is that he doesn't understand why anyone would want to hear what he has to say. Perhaps a symptom of modernity, in which action is associated with egotism, and spirituality with disconnection from the world. I've found that in my relationship with Christ, I have become increasingly oriented toward proper action that promotes genuine connection, not world denial. This is definitely an idea that I can apply more within church life, not just in my engagement in the world outside it. Thank you for the insight!
God bless us all - we all need community
I came to say this, too. I’m mostly on the fringes, but I still want community. I’m just wounded from trusting people too quickly, so now I’m cautious and looking for safety. But I still want to be part of the Body, however difficult it may have been in times past.